Brown Bag Sexy

Last night I attempted to have my third Brown Bag Party.... it was an utter failure. Normally I don't write about my failures for the whole world to see, but I want to make money doing this not the opposite, and I thought maybe one of you could tell me what I'm doing wrong.

A friend from work was nice enough to host a party for me and she said she invited at least 50 girls. Of those 50 only six showed up and only one bought something. I kind of wanted to cry and after everyone left I proceeded to eat almost a pound of cheese, crackers, and chocolate. Needless to say, my stomach didn't feel very "healthy" when I got home. I do not understand why people have such a hard time coming to these parties. I need an older clientele...

Alright, so to recap; I spent the night tossing and turning because I punished myself for my failure by eating too much, and then I had to wake up at 8 a.m. and drive to Santa Monica to start my internship. I am now still at my internship and I think I'm starting to hallucinate from lack of sleep. All I've had to do all day is look over press releases and make photo copies. Not that there is anything wrong with that, I am just an intern, but I swear I saw tiny little purple elephants marching across the floor a second ago. Yeahh I'm going crazy. I also have absolutely no one to talk to because half the office already went home and I'm playing receptionist for the day, but the phone hasn't rung in at least 3 hours (possibly longer). Ahhhhhhhh

I have a test tomorrow and I cannot bring myself to concentrate on interpretative literature. It just seems a little absurd to me that I have to read an entire book and take a test on why people act or how people act out literature. Acting is fun, I like learning different ways to improve my acting skills, but do I really have to take a 50 question test on modal analysis and how to eliminate nerves? Bah. I want to do well I really do, but I cannot bring myself to read more than a page or two before I start watching Tyra and munch on a banana flavored Fiber One muffin. This is really frustrating.

Although I think part of my inability to pay attention has a lot to do with the episode I'm watching right now. There's this girl on the show who is 16 years old but does not age or grow. She's been the same size and looked the same age since she was 6 months old. It's insane, she's like a real life Benjamin Button (well at least the end of the movie when he's old and turns into a baby). Scientists are looking at her DNA and seeing if they can figure out a way to stop aging in adults. They also think her DNA may help cure certain cancers and Alzheimer's disease. That's cool that she may be able to contribute all these great things to science, but I feel bad for her. She cannot talk or her express herself. Poor girl.

Oh and this other girl just shaved her eyebrows off on national television. Not for money, she just felt like it. Apparently she saw Adriana Lima do it in an ad and now she thinks it's the coolest thing ever. The girl even said she loved it, no crying, nothing. I would like to know how Tyra finds these people. It's amazing.

Alright I'm going to go back to studying now, it's 9:30.

P.S. I'm on a mission to find Southern California's best red velvet cake. Any suggestions?

Don't we look ready to skydive out of a plane?

Wendy Burch makes me feel even shorter than I already am.

I don't even know who that guy is but everyone wanted to be in a picture with him

Every time I burp I taste the food I ate earlier. So gross. Anyway, I'm bored and I made a virtual model of myself in a Betsey Johnson dress. I love Betsey.

Okay, now I need to study for my media law test that I have to make up on Monday. Blah law... so dull.

I feel like I'm going to throw up. Pupusas do not sit well in my stomach. God why do I do these things to myself!?!?! I'm not supposed to eat cheese.

Christine Devine emailed me today. I thought that was super cool. I feel special now, even though I do not watch FOX News.....

Sorry I had to take a break to go throw up. I hope it's not food poisoning. Clark and I did go to a random hole in the wall Mexican/Salvadorian restaurant with no rating on the door.... and we did happen to be two of four people in the entire restaurant. Oh the risks I'll take for good tasting food.

Anyway, back to what I was saying about FOX News... ya I don't watch it anymore, but that's okay I still like Christine, she's really nice. It just so happens that I'm not a reporter yet and I'm still allowed to have political opinions and I do not agree with most of what Fox has to say when it comes to politics, that's all.

Speaking of politics, I'm watching the newest episode of Bill Maher and he is going off on Bill Frist. It's kind of funny. They're arguing about the benefits of getting vaccines (specifically the swine flu). Now I wouldn't go as far as to say that I do not believe in vaccines, but I've never felt the need to get a flu shot. I hardly ever get the flu (colds and sinus infections yes, all the time, but not the flu) and I've never in my life gotten a flu shot. I also know of people who get flu shots and then get really sick. I just don't understand it. Plus, it's just the flu. Yes I know the flu sucks balls, but not that many people die from it... and if you take care of yourself you should be fine... even with the swine flu. People are little too paranoid sometimes. Anyway, I'm watching the show and I did a couple of google searches on the quotes Bill was throwing at Mr. Frist.... here are the quotes and my findings.

"There is no evidence that any influenza vaccine thus far developed is effective in preventing or mitigating any attack of influenza. The producers of these vaccines know they are worthless but they go on selling them anyways" -former control officer at the FDA Dr. J Anthony Morris

Google search results: Dr. Morris’ findings show that the flu vaccine, when inhaled by lab animals "tended to enhance cancerous tumors."

In the March 4, 1977 issue of Science Jonas and Darrell Salk warned, "Live virus vaccines against influenza or poliomyelitis may in each instance produce the disease it intended to prevent. The live virus against measles and mumps may produce such side effects as encephalitis (brain damage)

I love google... now they're talking about President Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize. I have to give full attention to this one. See y'all tomorrow.

P.S. What you do you think of flu vaccines?

I just spent the last two hours on the freeway. I hate L.A. traffic. Not to mention I still have some soreness from my accident and a broken tailbone that never quite healed right. So after the first hour I decided that stabbing myself in the eye would have been more comfortable than how I felt inside my car. Oh well, at least my car is pretty. I don't think I ever mentioned this but I did finally get myself a new car. It's a 2010 Barcelona red Camry LE (picture coming soon). Anyway, now I'm home and I'm pooped. I think I'm going to have myself a glass of wine, cuddle with the cat, and eat my left overs from the organic restaurant I went to after my interview.

Before I go... I'm sure you will all be happy to know that I finally got hired for an internship. I am now going to be interning at Global Green every Friday. The office is in downtown Santa Monica and I can walk down to the beach from there. There's also a yoga place across the street in case I ever feel like coming to work super early for a yoga sesh. Yup.... life is good. Except for the fact that I have no money, but what the hell who needs money. I have my health (kinda), an amazing boyfriend, a sweet internship, and my blog. Yay me!

P.S. In case you're wondering what my post title is all about... that was my dessert from "Kafe." It was delicious.

Yesterday I received a letter from the university saying that I was required to file for graduation by the 15th. Apparently I have too many units and they want me to get the hell out of their school (they used nicer words of course). I wouldn't have a problem with this because I want to get the hell out as well except that I've had a couple of teachers suggest I take a medical leave of absence from the university because of my car accident. Since my accident I've missed two full weeks of school and it is possible I may I have to miss again. I doubt that will be the case because I already have a lawyer and my physical therapy sessions are already planned out. But still... what if something comes up? If I do not file to graduate they will put a hold on my records until I do file. I didn't even know schools did things like this. Why is it that California cares so little about our education? The only reason I have so many units is because I'm a double major. I didn't know it was a bad thing to want to learn toooo much. Screw the CSU and the stupid people on the California legislature. Yeah I said it. pfft.

Since you can't see me I'll have you know that I am giving CSULB the finger right now.

On a lighter note. I received an email from one of the internships that had shunned me earlier in the semester. Looks like something just opened up over at Global Green. My interview is tomorrow. Wish me luck... and no I will not be on drugs this time.

The end.

This right here is my final project from my broadcast journalism class last semester. The quality could be better but you know how it is with budgets cuts and all. The lovely pink lady to my right helped me film, write, and edit this entire package. Please enjoy and leave comments. Also if you know anywhere I can get a relatively nice and inexpensive camera and mic it would be greatly appreciated. I need more clips asap.

Today I was a pilot and wore awesome glasses... and I volunteered for the Good News Foundation. Since most of you probably don't know what the Good News Foundation is, I'll clue you in real quick. The Foundation was started by a group of female reporters in the L.A. area. They decided that the news industry needed to make an effort to help underprivileged youth achieve their dreams of becoming reporters. Every year they give scholarships and grants to young female reporters and other charities who are committed to improving people's educational access. I wasn't sure what to expect out of the whole thing, especially because of my neck, but I had a lot of fun.

I had to wake up at 7:15 to get to Santa Monica Airport by 9:30. It was not easy! Even though I tried really hard to go to bed early, it is impossible for me to fall asleep before 2 AM. So I dragged myself out of bed, straightened my hair and drove up to Santa Monica. There were about 12 other college girls helping out and luckily for me two girls from my broadcast class from last semester decided to come. We were given green pilot jumpsuits and aviator sunglasses. We were then told our main duties for the day. Since the event was at an airport we were supposed to use airline terminology the entire time. We were told to direct people to their seats by saying "Alright everybody, we cannot depart until everyone is in their seat with their seatbelts fully fastened. Please make your way over to your designated seat." It was super corny but we had a lot of fun. During the silent auction we were even given orange lights to point at the bidders. The guests seemed to think it was really funny. A couple of random people at the tables would ask me about my glasses or start conversation from time to time. Unfortunately none of the reporters decided to do this. It's really hard to network when you're at an event where all the reporters are there with their friends and worried about their own networking duties. You never know when it's appropriate to interrupt and introduce yourself. Luckily, all of the event coordinators were very famous reporters and they were all super friendly. I spoke with Christine Devine from FOX news and Wendy Burch from KTLA a few times. Christine Devine even gave me her card and told me to email her. I am definitely going to take advantage of that opportunity. I met a few other anchors/reporters such as: Susan Hirasuna, Sam Rubin, Ruth Ashton-Taylor, Dorothy Lucy, Mark Thompson, Ana Garcia, Jessica Holmes, Elizabeth Espinosa and probably a bunch of other people that I didn't recognize.

The program itself was really interested. They gave out a lot of different grants, most of them were for more than 5,000 dollars. A woman named Teresa Simmons got a minivan, free movie tickets once a month forever, and 5,000 dollars. I was really impressed with all the people they recognized. Oh and I almost forgot the most important part. Chaka Khan was there.... and she performed. It was insane. That woman has one of the best voices I've ever heard.

I also managed to exchanged numbers with a couple of the girls who volunteered. They were all very friendly and it would be cool if we could all keep in touch and have networks outside of our school contacts. We'll see what happens. I am glad I decided to help out with this event, even though my neck was killing me the whole time. I was okay the first two hours, but after standing around for a while my neck pain became excruciating. I didn't have my medicine with me either (not even an aspirin) so I had to deal with it. I put up with it but after the show was over I realized I couldn't drive all the way home in that kind of pain. So, instead of going home I went to my mom's house, which was a little bit closer, and took a nap on her couch for an hour. When I woke up I felt a little bit better, but now I'm at home and I am pooped out. My plan was to clean up the house before going to bed, but my pillows are calling to me. Goodnight.

P.S. More pictures to come soon.

The following is my brother's response to my post about the Hills. I had to post it for the world to see:

"tries to hide the fact that he doesn't shower by wearing really expensive clothes"

oh he's taking styling tips from the twilight guy.

The Jetsons Judy Adult Costume - Costumes

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I think this is what I want to be for Halloween. What do you think? Suggestions?

Okay, I'm at home (for like the tenth million day in a row... stupid neck) watching the season premiere of the Hills, cause I love watching stupid high school drama... and I am so confused. What the heck is up with the Justin Bobby obsession? I don't get it. He looks like a dirty reject Joshua Jackson look a like who tries to hide the fact that he doesn't shower by wearing really expensive clothes. Not my style. Oh well, I guess you have to be crazy and weird to be on a reality show. I am really excited to see the Jade and Kristen fight they previewed at the end. I love watching talentless rich girls hit each other, it makes me warm and fuzzy inside.

Anyway, back to the real world. I am trying to figure out how to get an internship. I have sent out my resume to at least 20 companies in the last year and only two have called me back for an interview. Neither of the two hired me... obviously. I swear I am an accomplished person. I wrote for my college newspaper, I'm in organizations, I'm on the president's list. I DON'T GET IT!?!?! Help!