Brown Bag Sexy

Last night I attempted to have my third Brown Bag Party.... it was an utter failure. Normally I don't write about my failures for the whole world to see, but I want to make money doing this not the opposite, and I thought maybe one of you could tell me what I'm doing wrong.

A friend from work was nice enough to host a party for me and she said she invited at least 50 girls. Of those 50 only six showed up and only one bought something. I kind of wanted to cry and after everyone left I proceeded to eat almost a pound of cheese, crackers, and chocolate. Needless to say, my stomach didn't feel very "healthy" when I got home. I do not understand why people have such a hard time coming to these parties. I need an older clientele...

Alright, so to recap; I spent the night tossing and turning because I punished myself for my failure by eating too much, and then I had to wake up at 8 a.m. and drive to Santa Monica to start my internship. I am now still at my internship and I think I'm starting to hallucinate from lack of sleep. All I've had to do all day is look over press releases and make photo copies. Not that there is anything wrong with that, I am just an intern, but I swear I saw tiny little purple elephants marching across the floor a second ago. Yeahh I'm going crazy. I also have absolutely no one to talk to because half the office already went home and I'm playing receptionist for the day, but the phone hasn't rung in at least 3 hours (possibly longer). Ahhhhhhhh

I have a test tomorrow and I cannot bring myself to concentrate on interpretative literature. It just seems a little absurd to me that I have to read an entire book and take a test on why people act or how people act out literature. Acting is fun, I like learning different ways to improve my acting skills, but do I really have to take a 50 question test on modal analysis and how to eliminate nerves? Bah. I want to do well I really do, but I cannot bring myself to read more than a page or two before I start watching Tyra and munch on a banana flavored Fiber One muffin. This is really frustrating.

Although I think part of my inability to pay attention has a lot to do with the episode I'm watching right now. There's this girl on the show who is 16 years old but does not age or grow. She's been the same size and looked the same age since she was 6 months old. It's insane, she's like a real life Benjamin Button (well at least the end of the movie when he's old and turns into a baby). Scientists are looking at her DNA and seeing if they can figure out a way to stop aging in adults. They also think her DNA may help cure certain cancers and Alzheimer's disease. That's cool that she may be able to contribute all these great things to science, but I feel bad for her. She cannot talk or her express herself. Poor girl.

Oh and this other girl just shaved her eyebrows off on national television. Not for money, she just felt like it. Apparently she saw Adriana Lima do it in an ad and now she thinks it's the coolest thing ever. The girl even said she loved it, no crying, nothing. I would like to know how Tyra finds these people. It's amazing.

Alright I'm going to go back to studying now, it's 9:30.

P.S. I'm on a mission to find Southern California's best red velvet cake. Any suggestions?

Don't we look ready to skydive out of a plane?

Wendy Burch makes me feel even shorter than I already am.

I don't even know who that guy is but everyone wanted to be in a picture with him

Every time I burp I taste the food I ate earlier. So gross. Anyway, I'm bored and I made a virtual model of myself in a Betsey Johnson dress. I love Betsey.

Okay, now I need to study for my media law test that I have to make up on Monday. Blah law... so dull.

I feel like I'm going to throw up. Pupusas do not sit well in my stomach. God why do I do these things to myself!?!?! I'm not supposed to eat cheese.

Christine Devine emailed me today. I thought that was super cool. I feel special now, even though I do not watch FOX News.....

Sorry I had to take a break to go throw up. I hope it's not food poisoning. Clark and I did go to a random hole in the wall Mexican/Salvadorian restaurant with no rating on the door.... and we did happen to be two of four people in the entire restaurant. Oh the risks I'll take for good tasting food.

Anyway, back to what I was saying about FOX News... ya I don't watch it anymore, but that's okay I still like Christine, she's really nice. It just so happens that I'm not a reporter yet and I'm still allowed to have political opinions and I do not agree with most of what Fox has to say when it comes to politics, that's all.

Speaking of politics, I'm watching the newest episode of Bill Maher and he is going off on Bill Frist. It's kind of funny. They're arguing about the benefits of getting vaccines (specifically the swine flu). Now I wouldn't go as far as to say that I do not believe in vaccines, but I've never felt the need to get a flu shot. I hardly ever get the flu (colds and sinus infections yes, all the time, but not the flu) and I've never in my life gotten a flu shot. I also know of people who get flu shots and then get really sick. I just don't understand it. Plus, it's just the flu. Yes I know the flu sucks balls, but not that many people die from it... and if you take care of yourself you should be fine... even with the swine flu. People are little too paranoid sometimes. Anyway, I'm watching the show and I did a couple of google searches on the quotes Bill was throwing at Mr. Frist.... here are the quotes and my findings.

"There is no evidence that any influenza vaccine thus far developed is effective in preventing or mitigating any attack of influenza. The producers of these vaccines know they are worthless but they go on selling them anyways" -former control officer at the FDA Dr. J Anthony Morris

Google search results: Dr. Morris’ findings show that the flu vaccine, when inhaled by lab animals "tended to enhance cancerous tumors."

In the March 4, 1977 issue of Science Jonas and Darrell Salk warned, "Live virus vaccines against influenza or poliomyelitis may in each instance produce the disease it intended to prevent. The live virus against measles and mumps may produce such side effects as encephalitis (brain damage)

I love google... now they're talking about President Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize. I have to give full attention to this one. See y'all tomorrow.

P.S. What you do you think of flu vaccines?

I just spent the last two hours on the freeway. I hate L.A. traffic. Not to mention I still have some soreness from my accident and a broken tailbone that never quite healed right. So after the first hour I decided that stabbing myself in the eye would have been more comfortable than how I felt inside my car. Oh well, at least my car is pretty. I don't think I ever mentioned this but I did finally get myself a new car. It's a 2010 Barcelona red Camry LE (picture coming soon). Anyway, now I'm home and I'm pooped. I think I'm going to have myself a glass of wine, cuddle with the cat, and eat my left overs from the organic restaurant I went to after my interview.

Before I go... I'm sure you will all be happy to know that I finally got hired for an internship. I am now going to be interning at Global Green every Friday. The office is in downtown Santa Monica and I can walk down to the beach from there. There's also a yoga place across the street in case I ever feel like coming to work super early for a yoga sesh. Yup.... life is good. Except for the fact that I have no money, but what the hell who needs money. I have my health (kinda), an amazing boyfriend, a sweet internship, and my blog. Yay me!

P.S. In case you're wondering what my post title is all about... that was my dessert from "Kafe." It was delicious.

Yesterday I received a letter from the university saying that I was required to file for graduation by the 15th. Apparently I have too many units and they want me to get the hell out of their school (they used nicer words of course). I wouldn't have a problem with this because I want to get the hell out as well except that I've had a couple of teachers suggest I take a medical leave of absence from the university because of my car accident. Since my accident I've missed two full weeks of school and it is possible I may I have to miss again. I doubt that will be the case because I already have a lawyer and my physical therapy sessions are already planned out. But still... what if something comes up? If I do not file to graduate they will put a hold on my records until I do file. I didn't even know schools did things like this. Why is it that California cares so little about our education? The only reason I have so many units is because I'm a double major. I didn't know it was a bad thing to want to learn toooo much. Screw the CSU and the stupid people on the California legislature. Yeah I said it. pfft.

Since you can't see me I'll have you know that I am giving CSULB the finger right now.

On a lighter note. I received an email from one of the internships that had shunned me earlier in the semester. Looks like something just opened up over at Global Green. My interview is tomorrow. Wish me luck... and no I will not be on drugs this time.

The end.